ROSE
Rose (not her real name) aged 26 was unhappy in her job and dreaming of an adventure. An opportunity arose to teach in government in the UAE [United Arab Emirates]. She applied, got the job, signed a two-year contract, and flew to the other side of the world. She had no idea this would end up being an 8 year adventure and the Middle East would become ‘home’.
“When I was 5, church became a huge part of my life. I was baptised when I was 15, and throughout my teenage years attended youth group and was part of the worship team in my local church. Faith was a huge part of my life and in the life of our family. For me, church represented ‘community’ and in each city I moved to I would seek out a church to find my ‘people’”.
“Moving to the other side of the world, 15,000kms away from my family, I was desperately seeking a church community to make Abu Dhabi feel like home. I stepped into a local Christian church after just two days in my new home, but was turned off due to the some of the quirky beliefs of the pastors. I decided I’d just have to ‘do my own thing’, worship in my apartment and read my Bible. Friday was ‘Holy Day’ in the Middle East when the Muslims would attend the mosque and everyone had the day off. I committed this time to spend with the Lord, but over time, without a community of believers around me, my time with the Lord was crowded out by fun invitations to visit remote islands on jet skis, or head off a road trip to Oman, or to explore one of the other Emirates. Proverbs 27:17 says ‘as iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another’. I look back at this time and realise how important it is to have others in your life who will be there to ‘sharpen’ you”.
“Over time, the ‘high life’ became far more appealing to me. The first three years of life in Abu Dhabi were spent dancing the nights away in night clubs and spending the days soaking up the desert sun at the local beaches. I was having the time of my life and didn’t really notice how far I’d drifted away from the Lord. I always knew in the back of my mind that He was with me, but I no longer had a relationship with Him and I was having too much ‘fun’”.
“However, this kind of lifestyle was only appealing for a season before I grew tired of it. I was more captivated by the pastel coloured sunsets and loved going on picnics in the desert and exploring local markets. My work started to become more of a priority as I fell in love with the local children and their families. The Muslim people were so hospitable and generous, and genuinely loved me. I started to feel a part of the community as they invited me into their homes and in to their lives. I spent my weekends camping, cooking up camel burgers and playing cards until the early hours of the morning. I was so drawn to the Arabic culture, language, traditions and their sense of family. I was deeply admired the way they lived their lives and their dedication to their beliefs and convictions. My ‘Christian’ friends were still out drinking and partying, while my Muslim friends were living out their convictions unapologetically and allowing me to be a part of their everyday lives. We would engage in discussions about Islam and it sounded so beautiful and so contrary to what I had always believed about their religion. They could often talk me out of my own beliefs by using the Bible to support their arguments! It started to make sense to me that you would work your way to God, earning favour with him. It seemed easier to digest than the concept of ‘grace’”.
When living so far away from family, one can be surrounded by people and yet feel a deep sense of loneliness. I had wonderful friends, a blossoming career and a life packed with adventure and travel. But I didn’t realise how lonely I had become. I know now, it was because I needed Jesus. Instead, I looked to every other thing to fill the Jesus-shaped void in my life.
Rose took Arabic classes to learn how to read and write and became more immersed in the culture. "In the classes I learnt more about Islam, but it was portrayed to me as a religion of peace, beauty, and one that is honouring of women. They even convinced me we were worshipping the same god! In my head much of what they were saying seemed logical, although my heart was never in agreement. However, I decided to convert to Islam".
"My decision was beautifully celebrated and I felt an instant sense of belonging. For an entire week my Muslim friends threw parties and showered me with gifts. A colleague from my school was so moved by my decision she decided she wanted to gift me with a trip to Mecca (the holiest site of Islam) during the month of Ramadan [the 9th month of the Muslim year, during which strict fasting and prayer is observed from dawn till sunset] While I was quite honestly petrified about traveling to Saudi Arabia, I knew it would make a pretty decent story and was always up for a new experience!"
"We stayed in the clock tower overlooking Mecca and with an unobstructed view of the Kaaba [meaning cube in Arabic, and the holiest shrine in Islam]. People from all over the world were walking around the Kaaba every hour of every day for the pilgrimage. When it was our turn, I remember feeling so small, amongst tens of thousands of people. I had an uneasy feeling in my stomach, like I was going to vomit. And I remember looking above the heads of the people, lifting my eyes upward and praying to Jesus. I felt in that moment, “This is not who I am, this isn’t right”. And that was the moment that everything began to unravel".
"I returned to everyday life in Abu Dhabi and a deep state of confusion set in. It was like a dark cloud hovering above my head. Nothing seemed to make sense. I would read the Quran and it would directly contradict everything I had been taught about Islam. I did not find a religion of peace. I read about war and hatred, and when I questioned what I was reading, I was told, “We do not question Allah [god]”."
“6 months later I made the decision to return home to New Zealand for good. This was a chaotic time. I had no idea who I was, I didn’t fit in, and panic attacks were occurring almost daily. 2 years in, my Mum heard about a church she wanted to visit and persuaded me to go along with her. I walked in with a terrible attitude, but within minutes I could see the people around me were different. Their joy was real. They were so welcoming and for some reason I felt safe there and even looked forward to returning the next week".
“The next Sunday I started weeping during the sermon and knew that Jesus was calling me to return to Him. I went forward for prayer and was re-baptised that same day. My entire world was turned upside down in the best possible way. The dark cloud lifted off me as I came out of the water, and I had a very real encounter with Jesus. I was overwhelmed with the feeling of ‘coming home’. This was a moment that marked me, and I began the journey of falling in love with Jesus".
“The Lord has been so gentle with me, gradually revealing my heart issues over time and leading me into a deeper relationship with Him. I’ve become so aware of His pursuit of me. He never stopped fighting for me and protected me even when I rejected Him. I’ve had to learn to let go of shame and guilt because there’s no condemnation in Him. He has made me holy and righteous because of His finished work on the cross. He is such a kind and merciful God, and there’s nothing I can do that will ever separate me from His love”.
Proverbs 27:17 'As iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another'.