BJORG
"I was born in Iceland and grew up with a brother and sister. My father drowned when I was just one year old, and my mother became a Christian straight after she had lost my father. When I was 8 years of age, my mother asked me if I would like to follow Jesus. I remember kneeling down beside my bed and inviting Jesus into my life. I was water Baptised at the age of 13. Once filled with the Holy Ghost, I had a deep desire to serve the Lord and I have been a follower of Jesus through the Pentecostal church all my life.
"In my early 20s I went to Seattle USA to attend a Pentecostal Bible school for 2 years. Once back again in Iceland I became a teacher and met a handsome man, fell in love and we married. Then as a married couple we returned to the states and attended bible school together.
"Although my husband was Icelandic, his best friend was a New Zealander whose father had moved to Iceland. The dream was always to return to New Zealand one day. My husband’s friend married an Icelandic girl and as two couples we married in the same year. They went to New Zealand and a year later, as a delayed honeymoon trip, we went to New Zealand to meet with them again.
"They were very active in the Christian community in New Zealand and for 2 months we travelled both north and south islands and fell in love with New Zealand. We planned to move there, and our friends were very excited. We applied for residency and after a chance meeting with Winston Peters this was fast tracked through the system.
"Sadly the dear friend who had first drawn us to New Zealand, fell ill with cancer and died at 25. By then however, the seed was planted and we remained in Tauranga for 4 years.
"Several years later as a family with 3 daughters and 2 sons, my husband Pastored the church started by our friend who had died. For many years we called New Zealand home, but the Lord led us back to live in Iceland.
"Time passed quickly at our home in Iceland, Our children had grown and were now living their own lives. One evening after dinner, I went into the office to say goodnight to my husband before bed. There I found my handsome, charismatic husband dead. First, I hoped he was simply asleep and tried to get some response. I immediately called emergency services, but they could not revive him.
"I was shattered. His death was such a shock. Then I had to tell each child their father had passed away. Even though they were scattered throughout the world, they immediately returned home shocked beyond belief. They all reacted in their own way, and our youngest son, just 21 was angry. I froze and any energy I had went to supporting our children. I wanted to scream and tell everyone to go away and leave me to my own heartbreak.
"My husband ran a small import business, and I was running a guest house so dealing with the many practical matters after his death seemed like an impossible task. There were so many details to take care of.
"The Lord gave me a scripture Job 1:21 “the Lord gave, and the Lord takes away”. Through it all the Holy Spirit taught me to give thanks in all things! It was not immediate comfort. I was numb with grief, struggling through each day and night, and it was only over time these words began to carry meaning in my life.
"Some months later my daughter suggested I go for a walk to get out of the house. ‘Put your air pods in mum and go for a walk,’ she said. I was listening to music, in a beautiful riverside area along the walking path when I was lifted from the ground and thrown through the air. I immediately felt a terrible pain in my foot. An elderly lady had taken a wrong turn and driven her car onto the asphalt walkway, hitting me. The side of her car struck me, and her wheel ran over my foot and heel, breaking several small delicate bones and bruising the area badly.
"Just one year after my husband died, and one week after this walking accident, I was diagnosed with stage 3 cancer. I had experienced pain in my side and some swelling in my tummy region, so I spoke to my doctor. He thought it may be something with my colon. After x-rays, he arranged a meeting to discuss the results. I had a strong feeling it was cancer, so I asked my daughter and son to go with me. They asked the specialist at what stage was the cancer and was it curable. I felt no fear. It was supernatural. Because the Holy Spirit had taught me to give thanks in all things, I was able to even thank Him for the cancer. Lord, this has brought me closer to you. I know you are in control. Thank you, I have never been sick before in my life. Thank you for blessing me with my 5 children. Thank you for the love of my husband. Thankyou Lord for the cancer cells for they have proved you are almighty. They proved nothing is too big for you and the devil has not created one single thing. He comes only to destroy and what he destroys most is our mind with fear.
"Thankfully a cure had been found for this particular cancer through a dense chemotherapy. I had 8 months of chemo there were still remnants left, so for 2 further months they gave me a stronger medicine, and there was still some left. I was admitted into the hospital ward for this medicine that basically killed all my cells both good and bad. The cells are made in the bone marrow and this new treatment killed everything. It was very severe therapy and praise God He brought me through this and here I am today. It was a long journey, but it took me to a place where it was just the Lord and me. My immune system was so weak it took a full year to recover.
"I remember looking in the mirror when my hair was falling out and realizing, yes, this is real, I do have cancer. A friend took me out for lunch one day while I was still on crutches and my foot in plaster. I had a small cloth over my head hiding my baldness and when people saw me they were so kind and gentle. I was so touched and for a moment felt like a queen.
"Whether we are in the valley or on the mountain top, the Lord is there, always the same, and always faithful. It’s our feelings and emotions that change. There have been many ups and downs in my Christian walk and many times my faith has been questioned. I have been forced to draw closer to the Lord and seek His strength and will. As I have gone deeper inside myself, I have realised, God is always there. He is never far away; He is never cooler or hotter. He is always there, unchanged. He is the rock we can stand on and sometimes it takes us time to realise the strength in that alone.
"My courage and strength come from my prayer time. That supernatural power shifts my focus off the problem and onto His goodness. There have been times within my own family I have been challenged, and I thank Him for the time when each family member will confess Jesus Christ is Lord. He is above all circumstances. He brings inner peace. There have been times in my life when I have been literally sick with worry and couldn’t sleep or eat. I have learnt my biggest enemy is fear and I refuse to let it come in and take control. It is a miracle when the Lord gives you that inner peace that passes all understanding. I have learnt to lay down anything that does not bring peace. The peace is there for each one of us, but we must surrender and let the Holy Ghost fill our minds.
"In my final reflection, I often return to the Serenity prayer. Even the opening lines -
‘Lord grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.” These words have become profoundly important to me. They did not remove the pain of loss, but over time have helped me find acceptance, understanding, and a deeper sense of peace as I learnt to live with what life has brought".